Mom vs Wally the Weed Whacker


Want a secret to appreciating your husband more?  Here it is – Pick one of the chores that he usually does – one that you have never done, or just really don’t like to do – and then do it.  If you have any heart at all, you will become incredibly thankful for his willingness and ability to complete this particular task and it will make you love him even more.

The chore I tackled was the weed whacking, and I most definitely have more appreciation for my husband after today.

I don’t mind mowing the yard – in fact, I’ve learned to almost enjoy it as long as it isn’t over 100 degrees outside.  Emily is old enough to safely entertain herself, so I put on my headphones, crank up some music and get a good workout in.

Excuse me while I go off on a rabbit trail…

Does anyone else still say “headphones” even when you are talking about ear buds? I don’t actually put ON my headphones, but saying “I stuck my ear buds in my ears” just doesn’t have the same ring to it.  I also often say I’m going to “tape” my favorite TV show, even though we don’t even own a VCR anymore.  By the way, if you are reading this and you don’t know what a VCR is, please don’t tell me. I like believing my youth wasn’t all that long ago.

Ok, back on topic.

As I was saying, I have learned to embrace the mowing.  It really makes more sense for me to do it.  Rob works long hours, and I’m home most days.  If I want him to spend time with me in the evenings and on the weekends doing fun things, then I need to free up some of his time.  I’d much rather mow the yard during the week, so we can go to the beach on the weekend without getting evicted because our dandelions have taken over the neighborhood.

I don’t know if I can make peace with Wally the Weed Whacker though.  Not after today.

Wally and I fought hard today, and he won. 

I would rather go around pulling out those weeds by hand and edging our yard with scissors than to use that thing again.

I’m sure it’s 100% user error.  It’s like when I used to work tech support and people would call and tell me they couldn’t print something.  I kid you not, I had to ask “Is your printer turned on?” and “Is the printer connected to the computer?”.  More often than not, the answers were “Oops, no”.  So, I’m sure I’m going about it all wrong and I’m going to need a lesson from my husband.  Pretty sad, really.  I’m 38 years old and have never learned how to use a weed-eater.

Since thankfully you weren’t all here to witness the excitement, let me recap round one of Mom vs. Wally the Weed Whacker for you.

For starters, I lasted all of about 3 seconds in my shorts and a tank top mowing outfit before Wally started beating up my legs and throwing little pieces of hard plastic at me at top speeds.  OUCH!  I decided some pants were in order before I needed bandages.

So I got to work and quickly ran into another problem – we have an electric weed-eater and a huge yard but what we don’t have is a huge extension cord.  At least not huge enough.  Even connecting 2 cords together, I can’t quite reach the back corner of the yard.  I did my best, but had to stop several times to either plug the end back into the house, plug the 2 cords back together, or plug Wally’s tail back on.

It should have been smooth sailing at this point, but let’s just say that it’s a good thing I tackled the backyard first where my artwork can be more easily hidden.  My edging technique – and evidently my ability to make a straight line – need a lot of work.  At one point I went right through a fire ant hill like a tornado taking down a city and I was just hoping that they didn’t all go flying and land on me (they didn’t!).

Just as I was making a little progress and I told myself I would just finish one more area by the deck stairs – the part Rob would likely see first – the plastic line (the part that does the whacking) ran out.  I opened the end to make sure it wasn’t just stuck and sure enough – it was empty.

I took that as a sign I should be done too, and headed to the shower.   I’ll tackle the front yard after I’ve finished Weed Whacking 101.  Or maybe I’ll just get some good gardening gloves and a pair of scissors.

4 comments to Mom vs Wally the Weed Whacker

  • Kaz Bunch

    I too have a love-hate relationship with our weed whacker. It is gas powered which means it stalls in the middle of jobs all the time. Adding to the frustration is the 200 foot elevation change as you drive up our driveway. Thankfully mountain living means I only do it two or three times during a season and the time it saves my darling translates into couple time. I would recommend jeans and an old long sleeved shirt with eye protection. You may get close to heat exhaustion, but you skin will thank you.

    • Midlife Army Wife

      Exactly – it was worth it to have more couple time, but I think I will go with jeans next time. Shouldn’t you get a goat on that mountain? Then you wouldn’t have to do it at all 🙂

  • Oh I’ve had many fights with one of those things… once I cut my tv cable & another time I sliced my hose into several pieces…oops! But I love “whipper snipper-ing” (as we call it…actually I don’t know if the verb ‘ing’ tense is a word in any vocab except mine…), I love the way it annihilates the weeds/plants I couldn’t be bothered trimming & I love the way my arm muscles ache for the next 3 days (it makes me feel like I actually did something worthwhile) 🙂

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